DIVIDED WE... ARE LESS DICKISH - Brittlestar’s Weekly Newsletter - Issue #56
My Really Great Podcast is back. Out today is a great chat with Andrew Phung (Run The Burbs, Kim’s Convenience). Check yer podcastery. Sponsored by ClubCoffee.ca
DIVIDED WE... ARE LESS DICKISH
Back in 1996 I worked at Virgin Megastore in Glasgow as a Buyer.
It was a job well above my competency but evidently competition was low.
I loved living in Scotland. My parents had emigrated from Scotland to Canada in 1968 and I had grown up on stories of various exploits and adventures from ‘back haim’.
Virgin Megastore was a behemoth. Three stories of CD’s, VHS tapes and other assorted music paraphernalia. It was located in the old Lewis’ department store building where my grandmother had worked as a cashier when she was 17.
It was also right at the start of the pedestrian-only part of Argyle Street and on Saturdays that entire street was chock a block with people.
Chock a block with people pushing, shoving and swearing at each other for no reason other than being Scottish.
That made heading out for lunch on a Saturday challenging. You’d need to steel yourself and gird your self-esteem before swimming through a sea of angry insults and dirty looks to get where you were going. It was my least favourite thing about being there.
One day my Uncle, who had grown up in Glasgow, was on holiday back in Scotland and arranged to take me out for lunch. On the phone, I warned him of the throngs of angry Scots… he laughed it off.
He arrived, met me at the front of the store and led the charge through the crowd… except something was different.
Instead of shoving and pushing within the sea of shoving and pushing, he’d gently put his hand out on the shoulder or arm of each and every person impeding our journey and add in a congenial “y'arite?” or “‘how ye doin?” along with a smile.
The crowd parted.
He was like a goddamn Moses if Moses had been leading his nephew to a pub.
When we got to the pub (Sloan’s btw) I asked him about this magic trick he’d just performed.
He replied it was no trick. People just want to feel noticed and respected.
Well… I’m paraphrasing. What he actually said was closer to Scottish people are less likely to stab you if you’re nice to them one on one. But you get the idea.
Uniting for a purpose can be wonderful. Crowds of people turning into one singular entity is great… but sometimes that entity can be a dick.
It’s good to remember that sometimes divided we’re less dickish.
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Pictured: Author about to tell a really great joke to (unaware) no one