I feel so lucky to have not had to go through this with my parents and so far, at almost 80, so good. Fortunately my closest friends of 70 years standing are still not suffering this terrible state. It is terrifying to not be able to recall a word or name. I can’t imagine losing large chunks of your memory and abilities. Yes,you do need to talk about this with those who care for you . I have a friend who used to give her mom a big bowl of buttons to sort. Every day, same buttons. Her mom loved sorting buttons. It made her happy. It didn’t matter to her but even as one part of my brain acknowledged this ,the other wanted her to get bored or annoyed or feel patronized. This is what i needed to get my head around. Talking helps
I was a caregiver for my mother, who lived to age 102, and my aunt, who loved to age 94. One thing I was taught about older people is that they do best when they can stick to a healthy routine. Although you might like to get them out and stimulated, too much confusion and change disorients them. That’s just in normal old people; it is even worse for those with memory issues. I can completely understand why your papa was thrown off by the airport. Routine might be boring for those around them (I never want to watch another nature program) but it keeps them on an even keel.
My husband is entering this condition, having developed vascular dementia after having a few small strokes. He will continue to lose memory as time passes and more strokes take their toll. A wonderful help to me has been the book The Long Hello: Memory, My Mother, and Me by Cathie Borrie. I am sending hugs to you and your family.
My father was diagnosed with Vascular Dementia about 5 years ago.
My father-in-law was (finally) diagnosed - also with Vascular Dementia - last year.
My father is still the very placid, laid back, man he has always been. Confused, with little short term memory, can no longer read, or do crossword puzzles, and with other physical issues associated with the condition; but his basic personality is still the same, and he has been *gradually* declining (with long plateaus of little change).
My father-in-law, is very different. He's always had a short fuse; but now is actively aggressive. He has been declining very markedly, very quickly - without any plateaus at all - and seems to fall off a cliff every so often. Like dad he's confused, with little short term memory, can no longer read, and with other physical issues, associated with the condition. His condition is chaotic & unstable throughout the day, every day; but, overall, I'd say his mental condition is worse now than my dad's was when my father-in-law was first evaluated two years ago. And his personality is very changed.
Thank you for talking about your family's situation.
I feel so lucky to have not had to go through this with my parents and so far, at almost 80, so good. Fortunately my closest friends of 70 years standing are still not suffering this terrible state. It is terrifying to not be able to recall a word or name. I can’t imagine losing large chunks of your memory and abilities. Yes,you do need to talk about this with those who care for you . I have a friend who used to give her mom a big bowl of buttons to sort. Every day, same buttons. Her mom loved sorting buttons. It made her happy. It didn’t matter to her but even as one part of my brain acknowledged this ,the other wanted her to get bored or annoyed or feel patronized. This is what i needed to get my head around. Talking helps
Very powerful. As am fortunate to get older, but time comes with risks, illness, injury, memory loss -
Thank you for your insight and views.
The value in talking with others,- family, friends can not be over stated. Thank you
I was a caregiver for my mother, who lived to age 102, and my aunt, who loved to age 94. One thing I was taught about older people is that they do best when they can stick to a healthy routine. Although you might like to get them out and stimulated, too much confusion and change disorients them. That’s just in normal old people; it is even worse for those with memory issues. I can completely understand why your papa was thrown off by the airport. Routine might be boring for those around them (I never want to watch another nature program) but it keeps them on an even keel.
Thank you for this>. I mean stressing the importance of talking stressors out as , I think you said, maintainance for the soul. It’s vital.
My husband is entering this condition, having developed vascular dementia after having a few small strokes. He will continue to lose memory as time passes and more strokes take their toll. A wonderful help to me has been the book The Long Hello: Memory, My Mother, and Me by Cathie Borrie. I am sending hugs to you and your family.
This is perfect.
My father was diagnosed with Vascular Dementia about 5 years ago.
My father-in-law was (finally) diagnosed - also with Vascular Dementia - last year.
My father is still the very placid, laid back, man he has always been. Confused, with little short term memory, can no longer read, or do crossword puzzles, and with other physical issues associated with the condition; but his basic personality is still the same, and he has been *gradually* declining (with long plateaus of little change).
My father-in-law, is very different. He's always had a short fuse; but now is actively aggressive. He has been declining very markedly, very quickly - without any plateaus at all - and seems to fall off a cliff every so often. Like dad he's confused, with little short term memory, can no longer read, and with other physical issues, associated with the condition. His condition is chaotic & unstable throughout the day, every day; but, overall, I'd say his mental condition is worse now than my dad's was when my father-in-law was first evaluated two years ago. And his personality is very changed.
Thank you for talking about your family's situation.
My mom suffered with Alzheimers. It is a cruel disease. I watched my mom just slowly evaporate. Hugs to you and your family. 🤗🤗🤗
My mom suffered with Alzheimers. It is a cruel disease. I watched my mom just slowly evaporate. Hugs to you and your family. 🤗🤗🤗
My mom suffered with Alzheimers. It is a cruel disease. I watched my mom just slowly evaporate. Hugs to you and your family. 🤗🤗🤗